There is no doubt that you’re interesting. How you
came to this place in life is likely intriguing. Your personal life is full of
engaging stories. You’re a tremendous reservoir of useful information and
insightful opinions. And there is much you
can say about what you do and how you do it.
That said, as interesting as you certainly are, you
aren’t so interesting that what you have to say should consume the entire
subject matter of a conversation. After all, no one is that interesting.
When you get into conversations with others, don’t
just talk about yourself. Keep it interesting. Talk about you, talk about them
and talk about others.
At the very worst, you should have an equal split
between what you say and what you hear. Because, ironically, the more you talk
about you, the less you appear to have to offer.
2003, a group of researchers embarked on an ambitious, multi-year study
involving over 30,000 households across the United States.
Among the many things that this team was trying to determine was what impact additional income had on people’s generosity. What the researchers were able to determine was that for every additional dollar of income, households contributed on average 14 more cents. That’s no big revelation, right?
however, this study spanned multiple years. So, the researchers were also able
to look at the impact that generosity had on household income. What they found
was stunning. For every dollar of additional contribution, household earnings
grew on average a whopping $3.74.
What the researchers clearly showed is that being generous, while serving to help others, will somehow help you too. Knowing this, the question shouldn’t be, “Should I be helping others?” but rather, “How can I help others?”
Do you want to become better at
networking? Sure, you do. Everyone wants to become more proficient at connecting
with others and building productive relationships in their life. From these
relationships come other great contacts, referrals, information, opportunities,
and the list goes on.
Now, if you’re at a loss as to
how you can become better at networking, here’s a surefire means of learning:
Find someone who is already
successful and figure out what they do. After all, successful people got where
they are via building productive relationships. And they likely have networking
insights that will push you up the learning curve.
Ask for a few minutes of their
time so you can inquire as to how they build relationships.
And when you see them in public
or at events, observe them. Watch how they interact.
The bottom line is this: Don’t reinvent
the wheel, rather copy someone else’s.
2002, Principia College receiver Lewis Howes had a reasonable goal for each
game: Accumulate at least 100 receiving yards. And with hard work and
determination, he achieved this goal in every game.
one game, however, Howes hit his goal in the first quarter. His team needed it,
though. Principia was in a “dog fight” against rival Martin Luther College.
So, Lewis kept going. To keep pace with their opponent, he accumulated another 100 yards. And then another 100. And then 100 yards one more time. When the dust had settled on the game, Lewis Howes had recorded a total of 418 yards, which was an NCAA record in all divisions for years and years.
The lesson is this: Set worthwhile goals and work hard to achieve
them. And once you do, keep going. Chances are someone out there needs you to.
Networking is about giving – doing things for
people around you. From this, people want to know you. Chances are, they can’t
help but come to like you. And, with these two things, their trust in you will grow.
In short, through helping others your relationship builds.
To this end, look for ways to help your network. To empower this, make a habit of inquiring of your network how you can assist them. Probe with questions, like:
“Who would you like to meet?”
“What opportunities are you looking for?”
“What are some challenges you currently face?”
“How can I assist you in meeting your goals?”
If you consistently do this, in time you’ll find that others will be attracted to you. But they won’t just be interested in getting from you; they will also be interested in helping you too.
Leaving high school before completing leaves you short of a diploma. Dropping out of the marathon at mile 22 leaves you with the designation of “Did Not Finish.” Getting a bathroom remodel 90 percent complete leaves you only with an angry spouse.
life, it’s not a matter of what you start. Rather, you’ll be judged by what you
it’s great to have many proverbial “irons in the fire” and it’s good to be
diversified by having lots of things underway. But it’s equally important to
see things through. In short, there’s tremendous value in bringing things to
from time to time ask yourself, “Am I just busy doing things or am I focused on
getting things done?”
to take the time to knock things off your list and not just add things to it.
Let’s be honest. There is no shortage
of ideas. They are simply easy to come by. They happen in the shower. And
they’ll hit you while you’re mowing the lawn, vacuuming the house, and
commuting in traffic. Ideas are downright easy.
What’s hard is getting started. The
first few words of your book idea can be a chore. Making the first pitch on
that new initiative you’ve concocted is frightening. The first step of any
journey can seem daunting.
Yes, the first step is the hardest part.
But the most important steps are all the ones that come after the that. The
first one gets you moving, but the ones after that create momentum. And it’s
this momentum that helps you see things through.
In fact, without these subsequent steps,
your effort on the hardest part is wasted.
So, to achieve on any idea, get started
and keep stepping.
love passion. They love enthusiasm. They are drawn to it. They feed off it. It actually
inspires them to become a better version of themselves.
a great way to help build your network is to carry yourself in a manner that exudes
enthusiasm as to who you are, what you do, as well as what you stand for.
however, doesn’t mean to demonstrate this passion you have to be loud, animated,
excited or gregarious. In fact, in extremes these attributes can be off-putting
and detrimental. But even at reasonable levels these characteristics are unnecessarily.
Rather enthusiasm and passion are best conveyed by how you carry yourself. You need only exhibit a confident and optimistic demeanor that subtly whispers, “I believe in who I am and what I can do.” If you consistently do this, your passion and enthusiasm will come through loud and clear.