In her book Option B: Facing Adversity, Building Resilience, and Finding Joy, Facebook COO Sheryl Sandberg encourages that in seeking to help others you should avoid making blanket offers like:
“If there is anything I can do for you, let me know.” OR, “What can I do for you?”
This is especially true when the person you’re looking to help is dealing with hardship or tragedy. While well intended, these open gestures add to the person’s burden, as it puts the onus on them to think of something you can do (and in times of adversity they don’t need one more thing to think about or one more decision to make).
Rather, your efforts will be more appreciated if you go with something like:
“Would it be helpful if I did THIS for you?” OR “I’m going to do THIS for you. If that’s a problem, or if something else is more pressing, let me know. Otherwise, consider THIS done.”
Ignore what you hear on the news. Skip past what’s printed on page one of your paper. The world has much to be optimistic about. There are initiatives looking to tackle disease, poverty, literacy and you name it. The world is really headed in the right direction.
It is, however, far from perfect. There are still those who have malicious intent. There are those whose motives are anything but pure. And there are those who are misguided in both word and deed. As they maneuver, however, don’t sit idly by and accept it. As 19th century British philosopher, political economist, and civil servant John Stuart Mill warned:
“Bad men need nothing more to compass their ends than that good men should look on and do nothing.”
Don’t do nothing. Speak up. Notify someone. Organize a resistance. Take a stand. Be courageous. Confirm the situation. In short, do your part to make the world – even just your corner of it – a better place.
The million-dollar question in networking is “How Do I Go About Getting Others To Know, Like & Trust Me?” An easy answer is to focus on giving to others, as nothing will endear you to individuals in your network like making a genuine effort to help them.
Give referrals … Give additional contacts … Give opportunities … Give information … Give encouragement … Give support … Give, Give, Give.
When you give to others, they cannot help but come to know, like and trust you. In addition, you will develop the reputation of being a generous person. This will inspire others to want to help others too, and you’ll be swept up in their wonderful spirit of generosity.
So, with every person you encounter, ask yourself, “In what way could I help them?” When the answers come to you, take action. That will build know, like, and trust like nothing else. And this answer to the million-dollar question will in time yield you a similar return.